Wednesday, October 29, 2008

CNN election estimates - Oct 29, 2008.

For your electoral update and personal enjoyment, I give to you a summary of current CNN estimates and some smooth Reggae music to chill to (including a cat stevens cover...). Why the "nightly nooze" is not this p-i-m-p is beyond me. So check:

This is the current CNN estimate of how the states will choose. You will note a commanding lead by Senator Obama and a relativly weak showing for Sen. McCain. This does not make me sad.

This next graph is the CNN estimate of how some of the undecided's will fall.
O-B-A-M-A !

Monday, October 27, 2008

Lance's Presidential Endorsement

All right - It's down to the bottom of this campaign season, and I thought y'all might like to hear what this "Joe Six-pack" has to say on things. I mean, guys like me, we aren't used to getting the nod from total babes like that crazy hot govenor of Alaska. And man, she speaks to me, you know?! Lance doesn't need a translator to hear what she's sayin' when she talks about real American's. Heel yeah bro! Lance is down with that kind of talk. But I have to say that what really got me was this picture below. It is the highschool yearbook photo of palin's Daughter, and her totally righteous boyfriend. Dude reminds me of what i was like back then. Too bad I didn't have a totally hot girlfriend, bun in the oven or not.
Yeah - check that dude's style. Smooth Operator for sure.

Friday, October 24, 2008


Will Farrel as W. from a prime time episode of SNL last night. My favorite quote: W- "I tried to come off folksy, but it came across as douchy".

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

G n f'n R Album to be released!

Check it out, Hombres! It's Lance Rappin' your airwaves once again. And, man, I have got some KILLER good news! After a seventeen year drought, G n' F'n R is comming through with some new rock! And just in time too, man! You know I love the honcho, but that bastard ATE MY "LIES" tape last week. Yeah man, can you believe it?! I musta' got some dust in the cassette deck when I was rollin' that beauty down in New Mex a few weeks back. Man, was I bummed about loosing that classic. You know I'm rockin' it when those tunes come on. Here's what I am catchin' about the Album so far, "The album, “Chinese Democracy,” will go on sale Nov. 23 at Best Buy stores and online as part of an exclusive deal, the chain and Guns N’ Roses’ record label, Geffen, announced, confirming rumors that have been circulating in the music press for weeks. It will be the first new album in 17 years by the band, which has sold more than 42 million albums in the United States, according to the Recording Industry Association of America."

17 years, man! I mean, I used to rock it back in High School to that noise. Hell Yeah - those were the daze... Cool times, cool cars, cool bros, and "Sweet Child o' Mine" blasting on the Boom box. I even found a sweet photo for ya from my senior year. Hank Williams Jr., High School, class of '93. You can pretty much tell from this picture that I totally rocked it back then.

McShizzle to visit D-Town.

That's right - little ol' Durango in the national campaign spotlight for 15 Minutes this Friday night, when the Republicans 'red-headed step child' candidate blows through town for some good old fashioned rabble rousing and hell raising! Yee-haw! I even think I might go, just to see what some "Real Americans" look like. My guess is that the room will smell of Horseshit & Chewing tobacco spit for a week. The only bummer here is that Gov. Palin (you know the bumper sticker, "Sarah!") will not be making a stop here with Senator McCain. It's too bad really - I guess we'll be missing out on the "Lip-Shtick" portion of this season's republican campaign. (Thanks to Erica for the pun). Side note: I love dog's, but it is a fundamental truth that Pit-Bulls are some of the stupidest animals on the planet.... you betcha, Joe 6-pack! *wink*
But there is GOOD NEWS TOO! The McCain campaign, fully understanding the weakness of their candidate amongst a vast majority of the republican party elite (Joe-dumbass, your average work-a-day Nascar fan digs him, but of course this is also the guy who voted for the notorious Bush/Cheney ticket, twice) has made provisions for one of John-boy's contemporaries to make a guest appearance with him here in Durango (see above). The thought is that Yoda will appeal to middle age folks who grew up in the late 70's at the height of his fame, and also address the concerns of the AARP members in attendance.

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

Don't Rent "The Zohan".

Ok, Seriously - This is the shittiest movie I have had the misfortune to witness in a while. I don't even know what else to say. Adam Sandler deserves a righteous asskicking for releasing this piece of crap. AVOID THE PAIN!

Monday, October 20, 2008

PBR For sale?

That's right, the fabeled brewer of Olympia, Blatz, and the timeless PBR is up for sale. Unfortunatly, due to a brilliant marketing campaign based on the blue ribbon won in 1893, sales of the classic brew are such that even a large microbrewery would be out of the running for a buyout. This is a true shame. When the massive Landmark Brewery closed in St. Paul, the august Scheel brewery in New Ulm picked up the LEGENDARY "Grain Belt Premium Lager" brand, and began brewing and distributing it themselves. I am repeatedly reminded that it is truly the finest Macrobrew available each time I visit the mothership, and pick up a 12'er. Too bad they don't distribute west of Iowa.

This is a lovely shot of the old Landmark Brewery at Sunrise. Shortly after this was taken, the building was demolished. A true travesty. The site is probably a mixed-use high end shopping and trendy loft complex now....

Thursday, October 16, 2008

~Viva Blatz~

I was looking at the winners from this years Great American Beer Festival in Denver, and ran across the following category. I was happy to see one of my personal midwest favorites, BLATZ, getting the props it deserves. There are some that claim that consuming enough BLATZ can give you a case of the SCHILTZ, but in my experience, this is simply "Green Bottle Prejudice" or some other misguided beer folly. It was good to see our old boy Oly on top as well.

Category: 28 American-Style Lager or Premium Lager - 29 Entries
Gold: Olympia, Pabst Brewing Co., Woodridge, IL
Silver: Blatz, Pabst Brewing Co., Woodridge, IL
Bronze: Henry Weinhard’s Private Reserve, MillerCoors, Milwaukee, WI

Tuesday, October 7, 2008

Fall Cider

My buddy Chris had a bumper crop of apples out at his house this year. We took the time to pick a few... What a great fall activity - picking free organic apples in the beautiful Colorado sunshine, and then turning them into booze.

I ran the first batch through a juicer. That thing is apparently made to produce a cup or two of juice - 6 gallons was a little much. I changed tactics on the second batch by shredding the apples with the food processor, and then pressing them in a Home-School press I whipped together.

Here's a gripping live action exclusive that I entitle, "Next Year I am throwing down on a full sized cider press and apple grinder setup".

Below are the recipes I used for the two batches. Both are for 6 gallons. The first batch had an initial greenish hue as I juiced the apples without peeling them. A lot of sediment settled out and was removed during the first racking. The second batch was golden amber, like cider from the store. I added pectic enzyme to both prior to pitching the yeast. Also, I used potassium metabisulfate on the first batch to sterilize it 24 hours prior to pitching the yeast. I don't think that was necessary as the yeast will produce some sulfur, and thereby sterilize the juice.

Cider #1
6 gal Apple juice
3 lb Brown sugar
1 Cup honey
3 tsp Yeast Nutrient
1 Lime (juiced)
1 Cinnamon Stick
1 pkt Lalvin Champagne yeast.

This sucker was pitched on September 10th, and is still going strong. The champagne yeast should make this one pretty strong.

Cider #2
6 gal Apple Juice
2 lb brown sugar
1 Cup honey
3 tsp yeast nutrient
1 lime (juiced)
1 Cinnamon stick
White Labs Saison Ale yeast

This was fermenting like crazy, but has seriously slowed down. This is a hallmark of the Saison yeast, I guess. I cut back on the sugar as I don't want the Alcohol to get to high and kill the yeast as I'll need it to carbonate the batch. (OK, so I only had 2 lbs on hand and didn't feel like running to the store...)

Jerome Corsi - Making America more Stupid, Part Duh.

Oh what joy! Demented author Jerome Corsi jailed in Kenya for being the self-righteous indignant ass that he is. I hope the Kenyan government makes him feel right at home in an East-African prison for a while. Maybe even broaden his cultural horizons (and poop chute) a bit with 'proper' cellmate selection. How about you write a best seller about that, sucker...

Saturday, October 4, 2008